Don't get confused

Prayer works, try it some time.

Filed under done

I finished my third project for this art class. I am exhausted but I like what I came up with. I am unsure if the teacher and TA will like it, nor the students but it is a work that means something to me. I am proud of how it turned out. As an artist, my work is never considered finished in my mind but at 3:30 am, I must accept its current condition as critique starts in a little over 4 hours from now. One more project left for this class and I can be fully released from the weight of this daunting class. Soon.

Slogan

The Aftermarket. Ain't the original...

Hatman

I must be the Renaissance man at my job. I wear so many hats here. I am a salesperson. I help receive products and ship products. I also created the website. I know I don't do much with it now but it is my design. Without inspiration and time, it is hard to find myself wanting to do anything with it. I also do installs. This includes walking the job to see what is needed, create and send out proposals, do the install, and follow up with tech support afterwards. I also coordinate hardware needed and scheduling of the other installer needed for jobs. I also manage in its entirety our ebay online operation. It is hard to think of what I do here and the only way I get more money is from the percentage I get off of the profit of eBay and the money I get from installs. Perhaps the boss looks at me when I am not doing ebay or installs as a low supplier of help and service, because I've not seen a raise in 10 years. The boss's second person in command working here makes $2 more than I do just in hourly pay. I solve computer problems, cost problems, figure out easier and more efficient ways to do things, I box up display units better than anyone, I make price signs best, I showed the boss how to sell on ebay, then on Amazon. I don't know what I am doing here, besides being someone's b*tch. I hate how I feel confined to this job because of the economy and my finances and schooling and scheduling. I pray there will be a day I will walk out of this job forever. Until that day I have to vent about it here. Until that day, Tis only a dream.

I give up

<p>Sometimes giving up is the best thing. Today I gave up my stresses and potentially frustrating situations up to God. I got through the day with a smile on my face and the joy of my wife in my heart. I need days like this that when obstacles occur, it isn't the end of the world. Just an opportunity to fix and overcome things. I should delight in the trials for God gets me through them, if I would just seek Him.

Shaking my fist at thee

Damaged is this company. I see how the boss and owner sits up on high, trying to micromanage the company. He lives on cake and eat it too thinking. How can a company run smooth with an owner who is the manager who doesn't manage? This is a man who's thoughts run so fast that he is incapable of finishing verbal sentences at times. Spazzy is what we call him. Frustrating.

He is in such an elevated sense of urgency and control he cannot delve deep into any concept. His mind skims the surface. How can a company ever find growth without clear and strong guidance and management.

And what about vision? He has no imagination. Change and evolution are four letter words. I don't know if I could do better in his shoes but I am sure I can't do worse.

Resolve this!

Resolutions are not my thing. I see and hear people every year talk of new years resolutions. They sound hopeful and promising, with energy and intent. As resolutions are oftentimes a change in habit or pattern, it takes a lot of focus, work and effort to change. Simply saying "I want to change this..." does not offer follow through and a plan to accomplish it. Do we really want to change, or do we say we want to because a new start always sounds and feels nice. People are comfortable with themselves and, though there are things to make better of themselves, working on anything that doesn't immediately create joy or profit gets put on the backburner and is forgotten within weeks. Plan. Plan to succeed. Take the time to map out 1) what the actual goal really is, 2) what path and steps it will take to get there, and 3) how you will be held accountable. Make a plan, implement it, and be successful in what you want to achieve. This can only happen if you REALLY WANT TO CHANGE! I believe in you. You can do this.